Fear of Heights & Nosebleeder Seats Don’t Mix

Disclaimer # 1 I did not receive any free tickets. I paid my way, this is just a recap/review of the evening. I am, to date, not a blogger given free stuff to do reviews on. It’s not that I am not interested (just email me, we can discuss this), the opportunity hasn’t come my way yet. Just posting this for covering my rear is all.

Disclaimer # 2  I was completely aware that I had nosebleeder seats since I was the one who bought the tickets.

So last night I finally got to see Metallica in concert. Just a quick side note: was supposed to see them in ’92 in DC when they were touring with GNR. I was picked up as a runaway and put in a drug rehab center and thus missed my chance. So 17 years later here I am FINALLY seeing them. Was I excited? Sure. Until we got to our seats. Wait, let me rephrase that. Until we got to our section and I saw how high up we were. Upside, our seats were literally RIGHT by the entrance so I didn’t have far to crawl. Downside, we were 3 rows from the edge and I have an insane fear of heights. Here are a couple of lessons I learned:

1. When your spouse (or significant other) informs you that you will be fine when the house lights go down, don’t beleive them. It’s a lie. There is a slight improvement but not enough to let loose your grip on armrest of chair or spouse (or significant other).

2. People will stare at you in wonder when you have a death grip on anything solid and you stare at the ground. You won’t see it, you will just feel it. It’s ok, after awhile you just start flipping them off.

3. Some asshole from a local radio station WILL come out and announce “The last time this band was in (enter your city here) the arena they played in was left in rubble”. This will be of course 2 hours into the show (after the opening bands) and you have already imagined how your entire section will just break and fall on helpless people sitting underneath you. Let’s face it, after 30 minutes you have already convinced yourself that the entire building is not up to code and when someone blows their nose (or farts) everything will crumble.

You want to know what else I learned? Of course you do!
1. People will scream and applaud when NOTHING is on stage.

2. People will applaud and cheer for the Metallica roadies tuning up the instruments.

3. Some chicks seem to think we are still living in the 80′s. They attend these concerts with 6 inch high heels, 6 inches of makeup, clothes 6 inches too tight (or short or both), and hair 6 inches tall. Ladies…a tank top, some jeans, low heeled boots and some LIGHT makeup and you are still hot. Just saying.

4. Said 80′s ladies are either being carried out afterwards (and not because they are drunk) or hobbling with 6 inch blisters on their feet. Not to mention flat Aqua Net hair, blue eye shadow smeared to their temples and black eyeliner/mascara pouring down their cheeks due to perspiration. We won’t even discuss the state of their black/white/red leather minidress post concert. Ladies, if you take my advice in #3….we can still look hot post concert. Just saying.

So by now you are probably wondering how I even survived the evening. Well despite having the death grip on the hubs, I LOVED the show. I wasn’t too impressed with the opening band but I am a pit girl and I may have enjoyed the show more had I been down there. Who knows? Metallica is a fan oriented band. It is so OBVIOUS in the show. They played old and new (which was good because I have stopped listening to the new). What is good on the old albums is better live. Matter of fact all of the songs kick ass live and almost makes me want to listen to the new stuff. The fans themselves are a special breed. While many of them will fight in alcohol induced arguments, all of them are like a family. They greet you warmly, they are freaking polite, and they love to talk about their first show (and they love it when your a newbie like me). The band themselves refers to everyone in the audience as family during the show. And it’s not bullshit, you can feel the sincerity in it. We were at Time Warner Arena in Charlotte, NC. Arena is pretty awesome and the employees are wonderful. Nothing sucks worse than employees who treat you like a pain in the ass. Not those people…they were awesome! (this is where Asheville City Council should really READ this blog post and LEARN something so they can “fix” Civic Center so I can spend my money here and not Charlotte)

All in all, I will see them again. Just not from the nosebleeders.