All of us do these things that are just insanely stupid and illogical. Things like…..

1. Yelling at a deaf person. I did this once. Well maybe twice, but I am sticking with once for this post. I used to work with a deaf guy who was pretty good at reading lips. My problem was that I was so used to just talking to him that sometimes when his back was to me I would say his name to get his attention. Then out of frustration I would say it again a bit louder. Then louder. Then I would yell “Dammit ANSWER ME!” to which usually one of my coworkers would facepalm and say “Ang, he can’t hear you”.

2. Yelling at the tv during a horror movie. I watch a lot of horror. And inevitably I know that the dumbass is about to go into that dark alley even though you never go into a dark alley in a horror movie. And inevitably I start yelling at the screen “Noooooo you DUMMY! It’s frakking dark in there!”. As a result, I never go into a dark room ever. Because I know that one of my ancestors is watching and yelling “NOOOOOOOOOOOOO you might get chopped to bits by Jason Vorhees”. No really, I don’t go into dark rooms (unless I am on a ghost hunt) because I often wonder if I am in a horror movie and just don’t know it. This is what happens when you watch mostly horror films.

3. Yelling into the phone while trying to un-mute it. The other day my phone muted itself while I was talking to the hubs. I only figured it out because he was yelling “Helloooooo, hon? Are you there?”. The entire time that I tried to un-mute it I am screaming “I am here, don’t hang up, I CAN HEAR YOU!!!!!”.

4. Talking to myself and not knowing it. Most times I know it. But it’s a little unsettling when the 11 yo is staring at you while driving and you casually look over and say “What?” and she is all “WHO were you talking to?”. At least if I know it I can defend myself for being crazy…..but when you don’t even know you are doing it? Okay so maybe that isn’t so much stupid but something to be concerned about.

5. Asking the car outloud “Why won’t you start?”. Sure the car gives you clues by making strange noises or awful smells but it’s not going to suddenly have a voice, like Kit, and give you a diagnostics report. And no, the OnStar stuff doesn’t count.

6. Asking your child “Why did you [insert major offense here]?” because they always say the same thing “I don’t know”.  Will there be a child that will ever have the balls to just say “Because it seemed like a good idea at the time”? There probably has. They don’t speak much anymore.

What stupid things do you do???

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